Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Call Center Jokes

Needless to elaborate, here are some of my favorite call center jokes:

Definition of terms:

1) Active Socially - Drinks a lot
2) Careful Thinker - Won’t make a decision
3) Uses Logic on Difficult jobs - Gets someone else to do it
4) Expresses Themselves Well - Speaks English
5) Prairie dogging - where people’s heads pop up over the walls to see what’s going on from the cubicles

The Visayan Caller

Local client so mostly pinoy callers, usually from visayas…
Cust: hiillo! wala kasi yung bell ng pon namin???
Call center Agent: Hindi naman po ba nabagsak yung phone?
Cust: Hende naman…
Call center Agent: Kailan pa po ito nagsimula?
Cust: Ang alen?
Call center Agent: .Na hindi po nagri-ring yung phone?
Cust: Nagre-reng naman ah?!
Call center Agent: Di ba wala pong ring?
Cust: Hende! yong BELL!.. yong lestahan nong babayaran namin!!!
Call center Agent: aahhh… yung BILL?!!!
(hende kase nagve-verefie mabote… tsk, tsk, tsk…)

Cannot Access the Web

Agent: Can you click in to the address bar and type www.google.com please?
Customer: I’ve don’t this already and it didn’t work.
Agent: Will you do it again for me anyway?
Customer: Alright.
Agent: W-W-W-DOT-G-O-O-G-L-E-DOT-C-O-M and now press “enter”.
Customer: Oh, you have to press “enter”?

[fourth slide] " It really is like that boss since all of them are already demotivated."

Hiring Process

Applicant: The call center is a booming industry for the past few days
and I want to part of that boom! (sumabog ka sana!)

Secret Soup Ingredient

Conversation between a CSR at a Mobile Company in Caribbean
Agent: (pleasantly) Good-day, how may I assist?
Customer: (in heavy dialect)  Morning Ma'am, I have a problem, can you help me?
Agent: Sure, delighted to assist; please let me know how I can help.
Customer: Ma'am, I was cooking a big pot of Red Pea Soup and I had my cell phone in my bosom (in bra) and I realized that it not in my bosom anymore so I started to look for the phone Ma'am then I think back and the last I had it was over the pot... (pause from customer)
Agent: Hello?  Please do continue, what happened?
Customer: Yes, the peas in the pot was pressuring Ma'am, so I took the pot off the stove Ma'am and I took me long spoon and started stirring the pot to ensure the peas ok and I realize that the phone was pressuring into the pot for 30 minutes.  Now I don’t know what to do, please tell me how you can help me.
Agent: Well the phone may be water damaged, I'm not sure if it will still work my dear, since it was in the pot pressuring for 30 minutes you may need to take to the repair centre, which will be……
Customer: (interjects) Ma'am, don’t care 'bout the phone, that can pass.  Is the Red Pea Soup still good to eat? Don't have any more time to cook a pot of soup again.  Ma'am, do please tell me the soup not spoiled...it can still 'eat'?
Agent: (long pause…mutes the call...dying of laughter)  I’m not sure, perhaps you may confirm with a doctor if it still healthy to eat??
Customer: I eat it, it taste even sweeter so I will try my luck!  Take care, have a good day Ma'am, thanks.
Agent: Sure, you too!  Have a good day.

[fourth slide] "Bwahahaha, I pity this guy if he's here in the Philippines (Ti te is a slang for P_ _ _ _)."

Computer Geek

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer "Ok."
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No."
Tech Support: "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer "No."
Tech Support:: "Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"
Customer: "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."
A few minutes later......
Tech Support:: "Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen,canyou see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"


Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before
cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think it means the telephone point on the wall".

[first slide] Gosh, there is already a convenience store here on the floor. What else is next??
[third slide] boss:  What's this? A beauty parlor also?
boy 2: Boss... Want to straighten your hair?

I only use the bathroom!

Tech Support: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."
Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "What do you mean?"
Tech: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
Customer: "I'm Not going to do that!"

If you have more of those call center jokes, please do share them on the comment box!

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Buglasan 2011 Street Dance Competition

Jimalalud "Diwatas" from the
Hambabalud trees wave magic to the crowd
Last October 21, 2011 the 9 contingents from different municipalities and cities of Negros Oriental prance their stuff as they color the main streets of Dumaguete City and compete on the highlighted event of Buglasan Festival.

The Buglasan Festival is the first “festival of festivals” in the Philippines and is Negros Oriental’s provincial fiesta. The Province’s six component cities and 19 municipalities participate in the said festival and showcase their assets.

At exactly 2 PM, the vehicles that usually pass these streets are no longer seen. Instead, what occupy this part of the city are locals that wait for their contenders to pass and tourists that are anticipating for different surprises. Invaded, the busiest streets of the city have stopped its time.
Mabinay Langub Dancers act as the 
stalactites and stalagmites of their mystical caves

As one of the highlighted events of Buglasan, people cannot afford to miss the said event. The scourging heat of the afternoon was put on the sideshow and the temperature was raised to the limit not by the sun but by the performers.

Town after town, they showed to the people that not one festival is inferior or more important to another. After all each town is battling for the grand prize of P100,000. The second and third place winners will receive P70,000 and P50,000, respectively. Of the nine participating local government units (LGUs), six may receive consolation prizes. Energy level, parade choreography, discipline and orderliness of the participants will be the criteria for judging. Aside from these criteria, the judges are also looking for something grand, with elements that will surprise and entertain the audience.

Inagta sa Siaton Festival mimes animal movements
by the dark skinned Agtas

As the competitors dance their way to the Sidlakan Booths, were all the different towns rendezvous, they left the spectators smiles of contentment. Indeed, Buglasan 2011 Street dance competition lived up to its name as the Festival of festivals.

More pictures here...

Friday, October 14, 2011

Buglasan 2011

Finally, it is the time of the year all the Negrenses have been waiting for.
For us Filipinos, festivals had always been a great deal. It is a celebration for thanksgiving for bountiful harvests of land and sea. Each festival brings out the colorful sights and sounds that are so overwhelming and you cannot help but jive in exultation. This can happen with just a single feast. Every town and city here in the Philippines has at least 1 to celebrate every year.
But has it ever occurred to you that all these towns are going to meet and compete with one another for the so called “Festival of festivals.” Yes, that is correct!
Negros Oriental’s BUGLASAN FESTIVAL is the country’s first Festival of Festivals. All the different festivals of the province meet once a year and show off their magnificence through gathering. The Province of Negros has the following festivals to keep and most of these are secular in nature: SANDUROT (Dumaguete City), TAWO-TAWO (Bayawan City), YAG-YAG (Barangay Cangmating, Sibulan), LANGOB (Mabinay), SIPONG (Bais City), KAPAW (Basay), KINAIYAHAN (Dauin), and BAUL (Zamboanguita). On the other hand, legends related to local patron saints and religious practices are the heart of MASULOG (MASLOG, Sibulan), SINULOG DE TANJAY (Tanjay City), HAMBABALUD (Jimalalud), LIBOD-SAYAW (Bindoy), PASAYAW (Canlaon City), AYUQUITAN (San Jose), BUDYAS (Amlan), and PAKOL (Santa Catalina).

So what are you waiting for? Come and tour Negros Oriental at its finest!

13 Thu
Opening of 2 day Buglasan Organic Farm Family Congress
14 Fri
6th Buglasan Farm Family Congress
Grand City-Eide Civic-Military Parade
Buglasan Ecumenical Service
Grand Opening LGU Booths
My Negros Oriental Photo Exhibition
SMB Night
Dgte. City
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
15 Sat
Lutong Garbo Sa Sidlakang Negros
Buglasan Chess
Cheerdance Competition
Children Choir Competition
Minus-One Singing Competition Senior Division
Duet & Quartett Competition Senior Division
SMB Night
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Villagee
Sidl. Village
16 Sun
Rondalla Competition Junior Division
Rondalla Competition Senior Division
Balak, Balitaw Competition
SMB Live Band
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
17 Mon
Bulilit Minus-One singing Competition
Duet & Quartetr Bulilit Division
SMB Live Band
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
18 Tue
Live Band Competition
Sidl. Village
19 Wed
Buglasan 9-Ball Tournament
Rap Competition
Pop Dance Competition
San Juan Street
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
20 Thu
Folk Dance Competition Junior & Senior Divisions
Dancesport Competition Junior & Senior Divisions
SMB Night
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
21 Fri
Festival of the Festivals Showdown
Festival of the Festivals Streetdance
Buglasan Festival King & Queen Pageant
Dgte. City
Sidl. Village
22 Sat
Buglasan Kayaking and Canoe Adventure Race
Palkwela Game Show
Sponsor Night
Fireworks Competition Part1
SMB Night
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Rizal Blvrd.
Sidl. Village
23 Sun
Outstanding Oriental Negrense Awards Luncheon
Thanks Giving Mass
Cleanest and Greenest School Awards
LGU Booth Awards
Globe Night
Kasikas Sa Boulevard
Fireworks Competition Part2
SMB Night
SNV Con Hall
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Sidl. Village
Rizal Blvrd.
Rizal Blvrd.
Rizal Blvrd
Sidl. Village

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Japan invites you for a free travel

As I do my usual surfing today, I came across a very interesting topic.Japan is inviting 10,000 tourists for a free travel!

Yes! This is not a scam or whatsoever.  Japan was one of the best tourist destinations. Handling its natural beauties, it is still one of the best garden of magnificence in the modern world. Despite being one of the most developed and "high-teched" countries, She has remained her earth-bound assets.

But the recent incidents of earthquakes and exploding power plants affected the country so much. Many tourists are hesitating to visit due to the dangers that they are hearing. In this connection, the Japanese government created the said program. The catch is to have the 10,000 tourists discuss their experiences online, and share all their safe and unforgettable adventures in Japan.

For you to qualify, you must fill out a questionnaire about why you want to visit Japan and how you would feel about visiting it after the said accidents. As an end goal, the Tourism Ministry of Japan hopes to improve and renew the interest of tourism.

Personally, visiting Japan for me is one of my dream-come-true adventure. Maybe I'll try my luck on this!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Dumaguete wants to meet you

The capital city and main port of Negros Oriental. Popularly known as the "City of Gentle People." Where streets are lined with trees and motorcycles, not cars and taxis, dominating the road. A University town where you can see more students than working professionals. Considered as one of the most peaceful and clean city of the Philippines. It houses Silliman University, the first university outside Manila.

Just when you had enough of everyday stress and pressures, you finally reached the point of pressing the PAUSE BUTTON. Your mind started wondering about all the delicious food, breath taking scenery and stillness. Your feet is itching for a relaxing vacation but your mind worries of being practical with regard to expenses. For the first time in a long time, you want to feel alive but you feel so helpless! Unfortunately you do not know where to go.

Everything went into a blur when you realized that vacation this days is too expensive. Suddenly you came across this page and everything went into sublime. Your eyes made a fast stroll on the phrase - Dumaguete, the place where you want to be. And then you became curious...

The "City of Gentle People," is the capital city of Negros Oriental. Many claimed that this was named by none other than Dr. Jose Rizal, the Philippines national hero, when he stayed for a night on his way to Dapitan City where he was exiled. He was in loved with the charming view of the Boulevard especially during nighttime. It was later then named Rizal Boulevard in his honor.

Dumaguete came from the local term "daguit" which means "to steal" or "to snatch" because it was said that Moro pirates came to the shores of Dumaguit to snatched away young ladies. The Bell Tower (Kampanaryo or Belfry), which served as a testimony to this story, is still standing today and is one of the major tourist attractions of the city. It is said that the tower chimes to warn the local of the pirates when they are approaching. Today, the term still applies as the city snatches you away from the hassles of reality.

It is also known as the "University town" because of the increasing number of students enrolling in colleges and universities in the city. A total of seven universities and colleges in the city are believed to have high literacy standards and efficient education curriculum. Thus, students from all over the archipelago  opted to spend their college life here.Compared to the usual city life, it is less crowded and has a simple laidback atmosphere. This is one of the main reasons why a lot of tourists and visitors come. It is a place where you can still see tree-lined streets, with motorcycles rather than the usual cars and taxis, dominating the road. Everything about it is simple and serene. A place where you can find solace - from its people to the various places surrounding the city.